SALT LAKE CITY — Some people can’t wait for Turkey Day, others are dreading what could go down at the dinner table.
“Yeah, it’s going to be a little awkward this year,” said Sophia Isimanger.
FOX 13 News caught up with people in downtown Salt Lake City and asked them what topics they think are best to not bring up.
“Politics. Religion,” said Ken Osiel.
“Politics and religion. Those are the two things you don’t mess with,” said Steve Campbell.
“Tim Ballard and Operation Underground Railroad,” said Lydia Owens-Rytting.
“I’m a Democrat and my in-laws are Republican so we don’t talk about the presidential race,” said Steve Owens.
“I’d say when I was younger and just got out of college, it was talking about your career,” said Garrett Morosky.
Relationships were another touchy subject that Utahns suggest you tread carefully discussing.
“Right now for us, it would mainly be our wedding and who all wasn’t invited,” said Isimanger.
“Exes, ex-relationships, family members that used to be there that are no longer there,” listed JD Doyle. “Definitely avoid those.”
So what’s the best way to handle conflict?
“It’s much better to say, ‘Hey, pass the yams,’” said Campbell.
“Have another cocktail,” laughed Osiel.
“Watch football. That will help. It will distract everyone,” said Morosky.
In all seriousness, relationship expert Curtis Morley said avoiding conflict for the goal of a “perfect” holiday can actually create more tension.
“Those topics are perfectly okay as long as you’re in the space to listen with genuine curiosity to the other person’s point of view,” he said.
Morley is a Wall Street Journal best-selling author and founder of Counterfeit Emotions, which is all about understanding yourself in order to create meaningful connections with others.
He said there’s a difference between being nice and being kind.
“Kind is willing to lean in. Kind is willing to say ‘I care about you’ to have sometimes hard conversations but do it in love,” said Morley. “Kindness is where we want to be. Nice is that counterfeit that puts on the smile but is very surface level.”
He wants everyone to remember the purpose of Thursday: it’s about being thankful for the person sitting across from you despite the differences.
“Surrender the outcome. Don’t try and control the holidays, don’t try and make everything perfect,” he said.
